Hello! And welcome to 2014!
Hello, all. I think the best way to deal with not writing in like, a year, is to ignore the fact and simply move on. So here we go.
New Year's Resolutions: we make 'em, we hate to make 'em, we say we're not going to make 'em but end up making them anyway. I'm not always a fan of setting myself up for certain failure, but this year, I think I've got a good one. I'm going to stop wearing makeup.
Here's why. I have been thinking so much about the double standard it is for women to be expected to wear makeup and men not to. It bothers me a lot. How is it that men are expected to look exactly the way they do with minimal effort involved (shower, shave, put on clean clothes) and women are expected to spend an hour on hair and makeup every morning? That doesn't even start on the clothing. In fact, yesterday on Pinterest I saw a picture of men wearing makeup the way women do and they looked absolutely ridiculous. This just strengthened my resolve. If men look so stupid, how do women NOT look so stupid? Answer: they do.
New Year's Resolutions: we make 'em, we hate to make 'em, we say we're not going to make 'em but end up making them anyway. I'm not always a fan of setting myself up for certain failure, but this year, I think I've got a good one. I'm going to stop wearing makeup.
Here's why. I have been thinking so much about the double standard it is for women to be expected to wear makeup and men not to. It bothers me a lot. How is it that men are expected to look exactly the way they do with minimal effort involved (shower, shave, put on clean clothes) and women are expected to spend an hour on hair and makeup every morning? That doesn't even start on the clothing. In fact, yesterday on Pinterest I saw a picture of men wearing makeup the way women do and they looked absolutely ridiculous. This just strengthened my resolve. If men look so stupid, how do women NOT look so stupid? Answer: they do.
I always appreciate that quote by Erin McKean: “You don’t owe prettiness to anyone. Not to your
boyfriend/spouse/partner, not to your co-workers, especially not to
random men on the street. You don’t owe it to your mother, you don’t owe
it to your children, you don’t owe it to civilization in general.
Prettiness is not a rent you pay for occupying a space marked ‘female’.”
Now don't get me wrong. Makeup can be fun. Makeup can be nice. If you absolutely LOVE wearing it, please, don't let me discourage you. But there's a difference between wearing makeup because you feel naked without it and wearing makeup because you love to put it on. There's a difference between feeling like you can't leave the house, like you HAVE to wear it, otherwise you look just utterly disgusting and wearing it because you're an artist and you feel your face is a canvas. I am who I am. I look the way I look. I don't need to impress anyone by strategically adding cover-up to have perfect skin and eyeliner to have bigger eyes. I'm going to be me.
I can't promise I won't ever wear makeup this year. A chance to be fancy may present itself at some point. But I've never felt comfortable in a lot of makeup anyway. I CAN promise that I won't wear it every day (even to work!) and whenever that little voice inside my head says, "You should really wear makeup, you know, you're going out in public, someone might see you!" I solemnly swear to ignore it.
Happy new year, kids. Let's make this one the best ever!!
Yay! I am doing this, too, though it's true I hardly wear makeup to begin with. But since you first mentioned it to me, I have only worn makeup once (for me, that means some eyeshadow and a dusting of powder) for my "fancy" at-home with partner and kid New Year's Eve party. It actually felt special. I completely agree with your ideas here and your reasons. People should wear it because they like to, not out of obligation or insecurity. And you have already given me a great gift. It's only been two weeks, and I feel liberated. So thank.s
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy to hear it! I haven't worn any in a long time either. I feel good about it, too.
DeleteMm, I don't know about this. First, plenty of men wear makeup. Certainly not in a similar ration of women who do, but they do. And a lot of women feel better about themselves by wearing makeup. Who's to say how they feel better about themselves is wrong? Sure, some women go totally over the top, and perhaps they have more issues than makeup that need to be addressed, but generally, most women don't look like clowns or cake their faces in 5 layers of foundation. I think some people like the ritual of putting on makeup, as if it's something intrinsically feminine, or like to the feeling of the results, like you putting it on to feel fancy. Most females do it as a personal choice and if that's their choice, I don't think you can come down on them. I wear eyeliner and mascara everyday b/c I like my eyes and I like how a little extra something makes them bolder. I don't think I OWE my prettiness to anyone or anything. I don't think it's a double standard b/c I don't think women are EXPECTED to wear makeup. Maybe there are those circles out there where this sort of thing flies, but not in any circle I want to be found in. Also, slightly related, there are tons of males out there who spend way more time on their appearances that I ever will. This is very noticeable in the city. Maybe not so in rural areas, but maybe we should be placing more emphasis on men being less sloppy. So there you go.
ReplyDeleteI thought you might disagree with this. I'm not attacking your personal preference. It's like I said, if you truly enjoy putting on makeup, and you do it because you want to, that's one thing. But I don't think you can safely say that most women don't feel like they HAVE to wear makeup to look better. I remember after college several of my friends' mothers telling their daughters that they had to buy and learn to put on makeup now that they were going into the work force. So I do think there is an expectation there. I'm not against makeup. If you want to wear it, go ahead. I am against people who don't want to leave the house without it because they feel ugly and incomplete.
DeleteYou're right too. If you like doing it, then do it! I think it's more of a don't do it for other people thing. Do it for yourself. Or don't. Whatever. :-)
ReplyDeleteHuzzah! I think I will make this my New Year's Resolution too! :-) One I might actually keep! I think this is a bit of a cultural thing. Obviously, the way my life is, the way I grew up, I never really think about makeup. But I DO read some women's mags and there is always someone debating makeup (chemicals, so bad for skin, but how can you go without makeup??!) so I do think you are right that it is an expectation people have. It makes me feel self conscious when I read things about how every woman needs make up. (Same woman's magazines). I have been walking around make-upless for 30 years, do people just think I look a little silly? But this doesn't bother me too much. I mean I also wear skirts and a bun. No one would have ever pegged me as cutting edge fashion. :-) But like Nina says, some cultures in America, make up is just part of life. Something you remember watching your mother do. Something she taught you when you were a teenager. Something that is feminine. Whatever. I don't need it to feel feminine because I have never thought of it as an intrinsic part of being feminine. All the women that have surrounded me throughout my life didn't use makeup. Obviously some people, even some that believe the same things I do, feel the need to use makeup. It is cultural. I just happened to have bypassed that culture.
ReplyDeleteStill, being a hippy, I think going makeup less is the better, healthier choice. And no, I have nothing but my own ideas to back up that statement! :-)
So go, you!